Do you know what I love about coffee talk? That when I gather with a few women over coffee, unless it’s a designated business meeting, there is pretty much no topic off the table. We will cover pop culture, politics, and even controversial subjects. I love coffee talk.
There is a strange thing that can happen among women, during coffee talk. It is when we begin chatting about our husbands, children, family members, neighbors, or co-workers. We start to share all of those things the person does that annoys us, gets under our skin. Before we know it, and often unintentionally, our coffee talk turns into an out right gripe session.
There are times when we need to vent and blow off steam. Occasions in which we need our friends and closest wise counsel to help us see beyond the circumstance we are currently in. I’m not talking about those times, but rather the ones where we begin competing tit for tat over who or what is most annoying. I’m addressing the conversations where we find ourselves grouped up in solidarity against our common foe. Whomever that may be.
I’ve read, on more than one occasion, that the thing we find most annoying another person is usually a reflection on ourselves. Either it is something we too are guilty of doing, or something we lack and we are envious of. In the cases where it is a character flaw that we share in common, it amazes me that we are able to be oblivious to it in ourselves and so sensitive to it in another person.
This is why we have Matthew 7:5 drawing our attention to our natural inclination to examine the splinter in our neighbor’s eye in spite of the glaring plank in our own. We are reminded that we need to worry less about the sins of others and more about our own.
Something I’m notice quite prevalent on Social Media is passive aggressive commentaries about others “sin”. There is absolution because we don’t point to a person by name, use a piece of Scripture or quote from a theologian to drive home the point. While I am one who often takes comfort in the Scripture promise that vengeance belongs to the Lord, I’m fairly certain that doesn’t mean God is going about doing our dirty work for us.
If you are using Scripture to take a passive aggressive attack against a person, you are mishandling the Word of God. It is not speaking truth in love, and your words will betray your heart.