When you meet someone for the first time conversation starts off pretty slowly, until the moment “me too” enters the party. It is the moment we find a common bond with people we have just met, or break through a barrier with a person that has always been distant. “Me Too” will look different from person to person, situation to situation, life experience to life experience.
It can be a superficial as…. “I went to Parker Elementary School” — “Me Too!”
It can be a life stage, such as…. “I have a toddler, he is 18 months.” — “Me Too!”
It can be a serious connection, like…. “I have breast cancer.” — “Me Too.”
It can be devastating…. “I had a miscarriage this year.” — “Me Too.”
I have always believe that friendships are born in the “me too” stage, and the more things you have in common (the more times you say “me too”) will equate in a deeper meaningful friendship. What I neglected to realize was that “me too” is not always a constant.
Our “me too” connections may change.
Sometimes it is obvious. If you are getting divorced but all of your friends are still married, you’ve lost a “me too”. If you finally conceive a child, but your best friend is still struggling to conceive, the “me too” has changed. If you survive your breast cancer, but your friend is terminal, it becomes a different type of “me too”.
When I received Jon Weece’s book “Me Too”, I was expecting to get some reminders about things I already knew. It is good to know that we are not the only ones who suffer, or that we are not the only ones who have lost. It is a good reminder that we are not the only ones who are tempted, doubt, wander, get angry with God, or sin.
When Christ walked this earth, He experienced it as a man.
I’ve been tempted. Christ says, “Me Too”.
I have been hated. Christ says, “Me Too”.
I have been lied about, hurt, and accused. Christ says, “Me Too”.
I have also loved greatly, and Christ responds “Me Too” to that as well.
God understands what we are going through, God understands all of it because what we feel… He feel. He loves us, cares for us, and wants the best for us. So when there is a stumble, He feels it like a loving parent would.
What I didn’t expect to come from reading the book was the light bulb moment, when I realized how those connections can change. When we can no longer say “me too”, and what that means in the bigger story.
The last few years have been rough. I’ve seen a lot of changes in some of my friendships and I couldn’t put my finger on why it happened. I knew that deep down we still cared about each other, so how could these solid friendships veer so far apart. In hindsight, I now realize that our “me too” connections changed a lot.
I’m still home with my kids, one friend has gone back to work.
I have my three natural born kids, one friend adopted several children who have special needs into their family.
I’m growing in my walk with the Lord, others have chosen not to or turned their back completely.
I no longer have time to craft like I once did, but I have friends who are still meeting up for scrapbooking sessions and playdates.
My children are all in school, yet some friends still have kids at home.
We are done having children, other friends are still growing their families.
What I realized as an offshoot of reading the book was that it was time for me to stop focusing on the friendships that have changed (or ended). I need to stop longing for the connections I once had, and I need to begin looking for new “me too” connections. No one did anything wrong, it doesn’t change the fact that I love and care for these people who were important in my life. It just means that we no longer share a connection, we no longer meet each others needs in the same ways we once did.
There are things that some of my friends (and ex-friends) are going through, and frankly I couldn’t possibly begin to understand it. And, vice versa. They NEED to find people who they can share their heart with, and that person replies “Me TOO!”. Because, when they can find this person, they can get the support & encouragement they need to journey down this new road they find themselves on. Just as much as I need someone who can understand my journey.
There is a phrase that passes through social media every now and again:
There are friends for a reason. There are friends for a season. There are friends for a life time.
I loved this phrase because it was so freeing, I didn’t need to obsess over lost friendships. But it was hard for me to understand WHY the disconnect had to be so brutal at times. Now, I can see it with a different perspective.
Jon Weece’s book “Me Too” officially goes on sale in February, and you can preorder it through Family Christian. I know that this personal story doesn’t really reflect the overall message of the book, but it was a huge eye opener for me. To dig into the book will reveal an easy to read, and to relate, book that looks at the reality of life. Life is hard. There is pain, disappointment, heartache, suffering, loss, confusion, and obstacles. To which Christ says, ME TOO.
In these moments of difficulty, it is sometimes really easy to feel like God has abandoned you. You may lose hope. Jon Weece reminds us that we are not alone, that God not only walks with us, but He understands every facet of it. The promise lies in the fact that God took something as ugly as the cross and made it beautiful. He is a healer and a redeemer. Our life, our struggles and situations, are not too gruesome or ugly for God to do a great work. We just have to have hope, trust, and allow God to do the very thing He is good at. God constantly and consistently redeems his people.
I think you’ll love this book, and I believe it will give you a new perspective on the things happening in your life.